"i am the edison phonograph..." when the "i" blows up, the edges are choppy... (About 49 sec. in, the "i" also blows up, but it's a perfect circle.)
I really like how you did the "solos, duets..." It's very cool!
"that I am a genuine edison phonograph" I think you can skip the "that" so it reads better. I like the plaque treatment you did.
"the more you become acquainted..." spelling in aquainted is wrong. Even though we see "the more" first, later it reads "you become the more..." Maybe put it on the left?
There is a part where the word "voice" goes off of the screen to the left and part of a letter stays on the screen for a little while after. Everything looks so great!
I think the changes you made to the in the parlor etc. section really helps that flow better. And "dance" is much easier to read. Overall, your interpretation is really playful and reminds me of old playbills and letterpress posters with the mixtures of types.
I like yours. I think you gave effects and movement properly, and it works nice. And you express the tone well, over all. Only one thing, but I think that it is not a huge problem. When he was saying "songs" and " tenders", it is a little bit difficult to read because it moves quickly. If you want your audience to read it well, you can change a little. But over all, you did well, I like yours.
Every time I see 'mood' I giggle... Anyway, the only parts that I had problems with are when you have areas where an italicised decender overlapps another word. I belive this happens around 45 seconds with the word 'always'. I don't know if it would mess up your composition to move it up a little or make it smaller or something.
I really like yours. Besides the small changes that people have already commented on, there is nothing I would change. Everything seems to be done with a purpose and there are lots of clever movements and transitions.
I like the tone you used and the graphics really make it very unique. The colors make it seem very vintage and old, which fits well. I think that some of it moves a little fast to keep up with but that could be just because the speech is so fast.
I really like all the little things you did like the beating heart or the eyebrows on mood. It all looks really good...the only part I'm concerned about is the "I can enable you to always hear the voices of your loved ones." It's kind of an awkward transition, you might play around with something different. Looks great though, can't wait to see it complete
Looove it. THe movement, graphics, music, colors, everything is great. I wouldn't change a thing. I know that, that speech was super fast so I know it was hard.
Looks good, lots of emotion and movement. I really like the part with "In the parlor, on the porch" etc. The only thing I would change is that sometimes all the colors seem a lot a like and its hard to find the words when they move so fast.
Pretty good. I only have a few suggestions.
ReplyDelete"i am the edison phonograph..." when the "i" blows up, the edges are choppy... (About 49 sec. in, the "i" also blows up, but it's a perfect circle.)
I really like how you did the "solos, duets..." It's very cool!
"that I am a genuine edison phonograph"
I think you can skip the "that" so it reads better. I like the plaque treatment you did.
"the more you become acquainted..." spelling in aquainted is wrong. Even though we see "the more" first, later it reads "you become the more..." Maybe put it on the left?
There is a part where the word "voice" goes off of the screen to the left and part of a letter stays on the screen for a little while after. Everything looks so great!
ReplyDeleteI think this looks pretty good, I like all the effects and how you repeat different things things throughout!
ReplyDeleteI think the changes you made to the in the parlor etc. section really helps that flow better. And "dance" is much easier to read. Overall, your interpretation is really playful and reminds me of old playbills and letterpress posters with the mixtures of types.
ReplyDeleteI like yours. I think you gave effects and movement properly, and it works nice. And you express the tone well, over all. Only one thing, but I think that it is not a huge problem. When he was saying "songs" and " tenders", it is a little bit difficult to read because it moves quickly. If you want your audience to read it well, you can change a little. But over all, you did well, I like yours.
ReplyDeleteAt the part where "voices" changes to "ones" it is a little rough and you continue to see a part of "voices"
ReplyDeleteit may have been the internet though
I like it a lot
Every time I see 'mood' I giggle... Anyway, the only parts that I had problems with are when you have areas where an italicised decender overlapps another word. I belive this happens around 45 seconds with the word 'always'. I don't know if it would mess up your composition to move it up a little or make it smaller or something.
ReplyDeleteI really like yours. Besides the small changes that people have already commented on, there is nothing I would change. Everything seems to be done with a purpose and there are lots of clever movements and transitions.
ReplyDeleteI think it looks great, you did a good job capturing the tone and expressing it.
ReplyDeleteI like the tone you used and the graphics really make it very unique. The colors make it seem very vintage and old, which fits well. I think that some of it moves a little fast to keep up with but that could be just because the speech is so fast.
ReplyDeleteI really like all the little things you did like the beating heart or the eyebrows on mood. It all looks really good...the only part I'm concerned about is the "I can enable you to always hear the voices of your loved ones." It's kind of an awkward transition, you might play around with something different. Looks great though, can't wait to see it complete
ReplyDeleteLooove it. THe movement, graphics, music, colors, everything is great. I wouldn't change a thing. I know that, that speech was super fast so I know it was hard.
ReplyDeleteLooks good, lots of emotion and movement. I really like the part with "In the parlor, on the porch" etc. The only thing I would change is that sometimes all the colors seem a lot a like and its hard to find the words when they move so fast.
ReplyDelete